"Children are the research & development division of the human species"--Patt Olivieri
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| Paquita. A girl at the orphanage where we were in Mexico, 1981. |
inquisitive: adj. -- curious or inquiring
Some of the synonyms for inquisitive have negative implications. Nosy, snooping, meddlesome and prying, for example, imply that inquisitive people don't respect boundaries.
And it's true. When we're young, we have no way of understanding a concept like boundaries until we're actually told, or scolded, for violating one of the unwritten rules of social engagement.
On the other hand, who doesn't love the innocence of a young inquiring mind?
As I thought about these things I pondered as to why older people eventually stop asking questions. My first thought in that regard possibly has to do with our penchant for already having answers to everything. What I mean here is that after youngsters head off to school, it seems like the next many years are focused on answering questions, not asking them. Quizzes, tests and the like get graded based on our answers. How often are we rewarded for good questions? (OK, there are definitely teachers who enjoy seeing those young minds engaged and inquisitive.)
Peer pressure can also cause us to clam up for fear of coming across as stupid or ignorant. Asking a question that everyone already knows the answer to makes us feel stupid. It's embarrassing.
When I was in sixth grade my family moved to New Jersey. As the newby I was made to feel embarrassed and made to feel stupid more than a few times. On one occasion a classmate came up to me and said that there was a rumor going around that I was pregnant and they wanted to know if it were true. I had no idea what the word pregnant meant. Nevertheless I felt obligated to give a reply, so I said yes.
I immediately snuck off to the library to find a dictionary. As I remember it, the dictionary was about six inches thick, lying open atop a pedestal and though I could read the words I wasn't fully grasping them.
Fear of humiliation may be one reason we stifle our questions in public. I've certain seen it in the workplace where co-workers may use acronyms in a manner that suggests they are common knowledge. If you stop the meeting to ask what AML means, will you be glared at for being so dense? So you bite your tongue. The problem is, others may have the same question so that there has actually been no communication taking place because the meaning was lost.
Which brings me back to the beautiful innocence we find in the uninhibited inquiries of children. Here are a few questions my son asked when he was little.
Where did all the dinosaurs go?
Do dinosaurs eat worms?
Where are all the astronauts?
Why don't we see them walking on the streets?
Do ants have fire trucks? (no.) What do they do when their houses catch on fire? (EdNote: See my poem The Ants: A Tale)
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A week or two ago I came across a story on Medium by Adelina Vasile about her three-year-old son. It was titled Smile-Stealing Small Talk With a Little Boy. Medium as a blogging platform brings writers and readers together from all over the world. I find it a rather amazing time in history when ordinary people can write stories that people all over the world can read and respond to.
Next I noticed that Adelina was from Romania, a country many Americans probably don't know that much about. I remember becoming aware of that nation during the 1976 Olympics when gymnast Nadia Comaneci won a gold medal and became the first gymnast to score a perfect 10. In 2010, the memory of that event triggered a blog post titled Nine Things You Maybe Didn't Know About Romania.
It was against this backdrop that I decided to reach out and learn what kinds of questions a Romanian boy might ask. As it turns out, Ms. Vasile was open to going along with it. The next thing I knew, I had the following list of questions in my inbox. Her son's name is Matthew, so I will title this list of questions Matthew's World. It's interesting how wildly imaginative children's minds are all over the world.
Matthew's World
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| Matthew searching for answers inside a toy he took apart. |
If I look through a “miboscobe” will I see microbes?
Did the dinosaurs purr? (Like cats…)
What dinosaurs lived on our street when that big rock fell from the sky?
What do you mean our street didn’t exist when the dinosaurs died?
Not even our house?
Not even our neighbors?
Will a crocodile eat us if we meet with him?
Will a tiger eat us?
The tiger is a bigger cat?
Will a penguin eat us?
Why do penguins eat fish?
What is an Eskimos?
Do Eskimos live at the North Pole?
What is the Arctic region?
Are there any Eskimos at the South Pole?
When will we go to the North Pole?
When I’ll grow up I will be allowed to drink wine?
Will the police let me drive too?
What if the police will catch me flying at high speed? (he was talking about flying a plane)
If you’re in a helicopter without a seatbelt, will the police give you a fine?
Is it true that monsters don’t exist?
What is an ogre?
If ghosts were real, what would they look like?
How does a baby ghost look like?
How did grandpa die?
When will grandpa be alive again?
What is grandpa doing now? (the deceased grandpa)
When will we die?
Can I eat this until I die? (strawberry jam)
Will you cry if I die?
Daddy, what did you see interesting at work today?
How did you sleep last night?
What did you buy me?
Is there any surprise for me in this package?
What are the eyes that we see through?
What is inside my belly?
What happens if my penis breaks?
What happens if I lose all my blood?
Will I grow big muscles if I eat these 3 chickpeas?
Can I have 8 plums? Are 8 plums a lot?
* * *
The headline for this blog post promises to answer the question "What does it mean when we stop asking questions?" When I asked Quora, I found some pretty thoughtful replies. You can find those answers here.
Thanks for dropping by. And if you have young ones, what kinds of questions are they asking? Would you share them in the comments?
Related Links
When Kids Smack You in the Head With Some Philosophical Idea
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