29 Lines from Crazy People

Occasionally people recommend movies to me that were never big hits but touch on some area of interest for me in one way or another. Not too long ago the film Crazy People was recommended to me and added to my list. It’s about an advertising executive and deals with ad copywriting. While watching the film, I wrote down a bit of the dialogue.

The film stars Dudley Moore, Darryl Hannah and Paul Reiser, among others. Yes, some of the language is a bit off color, and true, the film has not been highly rated by critics or even viewers. And admittedly it’s not a great film as far as great films go, but it does give an interesting take on the advertising scene. It also raises a few good questions about what advertising itself ought to be.

I remember when I first came to Duluth in 1986 seeking a job using my writing and creative talents. When I interviewed at one of the local television networks, an ad copywriter showed me a little bit of the challenge he was up against. In the course of an eight hour day, he was expected to come up with creative, compelling scripts all day long for a wide range of products, gadgets and gizmos. He had one hour for each product. I challenge anyone to come up with eight new TV commercials in one day for eight products or services. From nutcracker to tire iron to ice scraper to used appliance repair services, whatever gets thrown at you that day is yours to tackle, stuff and mount. I don’t recall his name, but I got the impression he himself was ready to be admitted to an institution.

In Crazy People, Moore is an ad copy writer who has apparently fallen to pieces. He's been placed in a mental institution. His last ad mockups, over the edge and outlandish, are inadvertently put into print and prove to be dramatically effective. This is the starting point of a long, winding road.

The film is actually a clever exploration about truth and lying. The ad agencies represent a culture of lying to, or misleading, the public. The tragic characters in the mental institution represent the myriad ways we lie to ourselves, lie about our circumstances, and avoid the truth. It's actually an interesting set up for addressing serious issues. Even when scenes are not working or come across as forced, there's still grain to chew on.

Anyways, as I was saying, I wrote some of the dialogue from the film while watching. Just for the heck of it, let’s make a game of this. Which of the following is NOT a line of dialogue from the film?

1. Relax. Settle in. Make yourself comfortable.
2. I know what this is. It’s group therapy. This is a mental institution.
3. Try to relax.
4. Great. Great… first a mental institution. Now rain.
5. Hi. I’m Cathy. I’m a patient here, too. Do you want to go to a support session?
6. Yeah. Yeah. I’ll need slippers. Blue.
7. The world is a mistake. Why don’t we all jump in a lake?
8. That’s George. He only says hello. It’s the only word he has an affection for.
9. We have someone new in the group today.
10. Who can give me an example of a feeling?
11. I feel sad, for Emory.
12. Emory, why do you think you’re here?
13. Well, I realized I was lying all the time. Lying in my work. Lying in my relationships. Lying to myself.
14. I have fears. I have fears of being in closed places. I have fears of being in open places.
15. I don’t like the woods, by the way. I think I have a fear of woods. I’ve always had a feeling the trees were displeased with me.
16. I never felt I could get in on the ground floor with the really appealing people.
17. I’m changing the subject now.
18. You’re the first person I’ve ever shared this place with.
19. It’s wonderful. Absolutely wonderful.
20. How can we be getting so romantic so fast without any courtship or anything?
21. I’m nuts.
22. You don’t have to admit that you’re ugly, sir.
23. Business experts agree this no nonsense approach appeals to a new breed of consumer that wants to be dealt with honestly.
24. Emory Leeson is an advertising genius. I want him back.
25. Your ads are a huge hit. I want to get you out of here.
26. The staff is so friendly, and mental health is important these days.
27. Come to New York. There were fewer murders last year.
28. Ask him about the ballet tickets.
29. They’re coming out of their shells for once. Something important has happened to these people.
30. Don't look at me like I'm lying to you.

To find out which line of dialogue above is not in this film you may have to watch it. Thanks for stopping by and checking in.

The Madness of Crowds

One of the fascinating phenomenon of human beings is the our lemming like tendency to follow fads, get caught up in whatever the rest of the masses are doing, even if it means leaping from cliffs. I'm old enough to remember the hula hoop craze (now that you know) and who among us did not have one? I believe Wham-O was the manufacturer to introduce the fifty cent loop of plastic into the market, selling them at three dollars each that spring in 1958. At first Wham-O cranked out 20,000 a day. But competition quickly emerged and by Christmas every story in a America had boat loads of these things, with 28 companies cranking them out 24/7. Even at fifty cents apiece, the stores remained full of them when the holidays were over. Some unlucky sap would have to store them in warehouses for twenty years till they became a re-bound fad again as young parents told their much younger children, "Whatever happened to the hula hoop? Maybe we can still find one somewhere."

In the investment scene, the mania for tech stocks hurled the stock market to unprecedented heights. Books were published stating that redwoods really can grow so high they will reach the moon, and people believed them. The bubble burst, of course, and though many people lost their nest eggs a lot of writers made money on the deal, so it was not a total bust.

It is in the light of these crazes that we look back in wonder at some of the crazy things people did in the past, and get at least a partial understanding of how it happened.

For example, people sitting atop poles.... In the 4th century, Pillar Saints like St. Simeon Stylites did it for God (demonstrating that they were abandoning the temptations of this world and sitting on pillars in the desert.) But why did all those crazy folks do it again in thirties? A guy named Shipwreck Kelly climbed atop a pole for 13 days in the winter of 1930. This made news, as do most crazy things people do in New York on a slow news day.

The stunt was pulled numerous times over the next decade, but occasionally police had to intervene because the crowds below were blocking traffic. Others imitated the stunt, staying atop flagpoles and telephone poles for days, weeks, even months on end. Please don't ask me how they went to the bathroom. Maybe that's what drew the crowds. What draws the risk takers is self-evident: 15 minutes of fame.

Speaking of endurance tests, what about those dance marathons that were a craze circa 1928-1930? There were times when I wanted to dance all night, but not many times I wanted to dance all week.

The chain letter craze, contest craze, the Confederate flag craze, the Scrabble craze, the Barbie Doll craze, the goldfish eating craze -- it seems the American way to get crazy over the latest thing for a season.

The Yo-Yo craze of 1951 made Luck, Wisconsin the Yo-Yo capital of the world. A guy named Duncan became the Henry Ford of the Yo-Yo industry.

Miniature golf hit the scene in 1927.... three years later, there were 40,000 courses taking in 225 million dollars in a single year... which is eighteen gazillion in today's dollars. Elizabeth, Queen of Belgium, was addicted to the game. Even mobster Al Capone began investing in the craze.

Pet rocks made an out of work ad agency creative Gary Dahl into a millionaire. Their popularity was chiefly due to the ease with which they could be trained to sit and stay. And they never barked at rabbits, squirrels or deer in the yard. The craze lasted about six months.

To be sure, every age has its foolishness. In recent years, perhaps Reality TV fits the bill. Or the new game shows like Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? which aired not just weekly but almost daily for a spell. What will be next? I haven't got a clue... To quote from my poem The Future Remains Unwrit:

We're a complicated people,

a mixed and crazy breed.

We can always blame our parents,

for we're all of Adam's seed,

though in fact it changes nothing

and there's nothing guaranteed.

The future remains unwrit.