Watered-Down Love: Dylan Contrasts Agape With Its Lesser Kin

"If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing."
--I Corinthians 13:1-3

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Last night I saw a trailer for a film in which the main character is trying to work out whether he really loves this person with whom he is in a relationship. There's a snippet in which he is hashing out this question with his mother. The dialogue reminded me of the Young Rascals' song, "How Can I Be Sure?" If you recall the lyrics, he sings, "How can I be sure, in a world that's constantly changing, how can I be sure... with you?"

One of the more famous songs in Fiddler on the Roof begins, "Do you love me?" (The song begin with an inquiry by Tevye, to his wife Golde, whom he wed in an arranged marriage.) This story, too, revolves around meanings of love.

Hollywood love, rock 'n roll love, carnal love, erotic love, brotherly love, All You Need Is Love... Love comes in a whole range of flavors. The Greeks recognized this and used different words to describe four distinct types of love -- storge, philia, eros and agape -- which C.S.Lewis wrote about in his insightful volume The Four Loves.

On the fifth track of his album Shot Of Love (1981), Bob Dylan shares his own insights on this topic in a song called Watered-Down Love. Here are the lyrics, with alternating colors identifying earmarks of a higher love and what it is not. It's an interesting literary device, clarifying what something is by contrasting it with what it is not.

Watered Down Love

Love that's pure hopes all things
Believes all things, won't pull no strings
Won't sneak into your room, tall, dark and handsome
Capture your soul and hold it for ransom.

You don't want a love that's pure
You want to drown love
You want a watered-down love.

Love that's pure, it don't make no claims
Intercedes for you 'stead of casting you blame
Will not deceive you or lead you to transgression
Won't write it up and make you sign a false confession.

You don't want a love that's pure
You want to drown love
You want a watered-down love.

Love that's pure won't lead you astray
Won't hold you back, won't mess up your day
Won't pervert you, corrupt you with stupid wishes
It will not make you envious. It won't make you suspicious.

You don't want a love that's pure
You want to drown love
You want a watered-down love.

Love that's pure ain't no accident
Always on time, is always content
An eternal flame, quietly burning
Never need to be proud or loud, nor restlessly yearning.

You don't want a love that's pure
You want to drown love
You want a watered-down love.

Copyright © 1981 by Special Rider Music

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From June 10 to November 21, Dylan performed this song 41 times in 1981.

What is love? It takes a lifetime to learn... and part of that time is learning what it's not. When we think about life's big questions -- like, Why am I here? -- this is one of the big ones. 

Language, Rock 'n Roll and Love

It’s interesting to study the history and evolution of language. We seldom realize that many words once had very different meanings. For example, the word “awful” once meant something wonderful, delightful, amazing… full of awe. Today, a New York chef will not be too pleased when you tell him the main course was awful.

The word manufacture has also changed significantly. The Latin root from which this word is derived meant “to make by hand.” In olden times to say a thing was manufactured meant that this product had been hand crafted by craftsmen. Now it means the opposite. A manufacturing plant today produces machine-made goods. Strange.

There are an abundance of examples of words with meanings that have altered over time. A balloon was once a game that people played with an inflated leather ball. Evidently the first hot air balloons in France must have reminded people of this ball, so they borrowed the existing word. The word cute had once been acute, meaning “keenly perceptive” and shrewd. Today we call babies cute and puppies cute, but I doubt that either of these are keenly perceptive in the manner of the original word.

The word propaganda is another word that has undergone change. It is actually a Latin word that was introduced in 1622 by Pope Gregory XV in response to the global rise of Protestantism. He formed an “Office for the Propagation of the Faith” to oversee Catholic mission efforts in the New World. (The official use of inquisitions was instituted four centuries earlier in 1232 by Pope Gregory IX.) The Nazi use of propaganda pretty much placed a stake in the heart of this word representing something good.

The preceding is simply a setup for a brief discussion of another word that has undergone change, and that is love, though maybe the problem isn't the word itself but the English language and its use of the word.

C.S. Lewis wrote a richly insightful discourse on this which became his book The Four Loves in which he outlines the meanings behind four Greek words that are translated "love" in our language, but which convey distinctly different meanings: storge (familial love), philadelphia (friendship), eros (romance), and agape (selfless, unconditional love.)

The distinctions Lewis makes are painted with such detail that a single reading of the book permanently etches the four images in one's mind. But Lewis makes another distinction in this slim volume that is often less remembered. Perhaps this is due in part because the book is titled The Four Loves and once we get that, we think we've gotten it.

An analysis of modern rock 'n roll brings it home with a measure of clarity, though also much of it serves to dilute and obfuscate the word's meanings. For example, I was listening to the the Rolling Stones song Happy the other day, and noted how in the chorus Mick Jagger implores, "I need a love to keep me happy." And since our minds are a catalog of contemporary music, a dozen other songs came readily to mind from Love Me Do to Honey Don't.

Pop music is saturated with songs that use the word love. But Lewis' book examines love from a different angle beyond the loves its title is derived from. An important distinction that he makes is between "need-love" and "gift-love."

The painful pleading in a song like, "Baby, I need your loving" can strike a chord in our hearts because we've all known this neediness. When we were infants it's all we ever knew. Who has not wanted the affirmations of love to assuage our isolation and loneliness?

But there is another kind of love, a love more mature, perhaps not unlike that captured by Coltrane's classic A Love Supreme. On his album Shot of Love Dylan masterfully brings this clarification through his song Watered-Down Love. In a world of needy hearts Dylan admonishes those who would take advantage of the needy. He also explains the difference between the common need-relationship and the higher way.

Watered-Down Love

Love that’s pure hopes all things

Believes all things, won’t pull no strings

Won’t sneak up into your room, tall, dark and handsome

Capture your heart and hold it for ransom

You don’t want a love that’s pure

You wanna drown love

You want a watered-down love

Love that’s pure, it don’t make no false claims

Intercedes for you ’stead of casting you blame

Will not deceive you or lead you into transgression

Won’t write it up and make you sign a false confession

You don’t want a love that’s pure

You wanna drown love

You want a watered-down love

Love that’s pure won’t lead you astray

Won’t hold you back, won’t mess up your day

Won’t pervert you, corrupt you with stupid wishes

It will not make you envious, it don’t make you suspicious

You don’t want a love that’s pure

You wanna drown love

You want a watered-down love

Love that’s pure ain’t no accident

Always on time, is always content

An eternal flame, quietly burning

Never needs to be proud or loud or restlessly yearning

You don’t want a love that’s pure

You wanna drown love

You want a watered-down love

Copyright © 1981 by Special Rider Music 

As always, there is much more that can be said. What do you think?